It was my first visit to a killing station. El Refugio is full to bursting; even so Fabienne had promised me I could take one little dog. Or maybe a medium sized one. I knew it would be hard. I had, nevertheless, expected that one dog in particular would stand out. That while it wouldn't be easy to leave the others, there would be one that would be an obvious choice. It didn't happen like that. I was so confused, thoughts whirling round in my head - choose this little dog? Or that one?
In the first cage a small, beige dog with sticky out teeth drew my attention. I felt I should choose him simply because of the sticky out teeth. With him was a small, lively black and white puppy jumping up and down - 'me, me, me'. And two other puppies - bundles of matted fur - were very sick. Besides, ACE is already caring for an unprecedented number of puppies - with more arriving almost daily.
Pippy
In the cages of the killing station were dogs of all shapes and sizes - big ones, small ones, medium sized ones. All colours. Some quiet. Some putting their paws through the cage. In the end I simply had to do it quickly. I chose Pippy because she seemed as confused as I was. She would take a few steps forward and then retreat in fear. I had no idea how young she was, nor that she too was not well. And then, when she was out of the cage and in my arms the killing station man told Amalia, who had come in with me, that her sister was still in the cage.
I was supposed to take one - taking even one was stretching it. Although it would have broken my heart I thought I might just have to put Pippy back, how could I separate her from her sister? Amalia phoned Fabienne. Fabienne, wonderful compassionate Fabienne, said 'yes'. We took Cloie out of her cage to join her sister. What I didn't know at the time was that another little dog that I thought was sleeping was yet another sister. But she was already dead.
Cloie
I was so happy to have saved these little ones. However, it wasn't all straightforward. For a start they were not so much little dogs as puppies, about three and a half months old. More puppies! And not very well, Pippy especially. Fabienne warned me not to get my hopes up, but everyone would do their best. They would go into foster with Isabelleke who would take great care of them.
We were to meet Isabelleke the next day at the airport. In the meantime they would see the vet at the Refugio and get some good food and lots of cuddles. The following day they already looked so much better. For various reasons we were not able to hand them over as planned; they went off very early the day after so I didn't get to say goodbye.
That is not important. The important thing is that they are getting better, I believe, though I can see from Fabienne's posting on Facebook on 16th that they are still very weak. But there's hope and even more good news for if I have understood it rightly they are both already reserved and will stay together. They won't be separated.
Pippy and Cloie - together forever
In spite of all this happy news I found I was haunted by the thought of the other dogs and in particular by the lively black and white puppy 'me, me, me' and even more by the little beige dog with the sticky out teeth. I talked to Fabienne about it, because it helped and I knew she understood so well. She herself had been unable to go into the killing station, knowing she couldn't take any dogs herself because she simply couldn't fit them in.
She doesn't give up. She found a way. The puppies in the first cage, including 'me, me, me' are now in foster care. My sweet little sticky out teeth is with a lovely man called Michael. Pippy & Cloie are with Isabelleke until they go to their golden basket. All safe. They owe their lives to Fabienne, as do so many others. Nearly 15,000 now - and counting. What an extraordinary and wonderful achievement.
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